Let This Be The Fuel To Your Fire…
It’s a fact – we all have goals in life. Even the most timid among us have things they want to accomplish.
Maybe your goals are to get a big promotion, or to run a marathon, or to start a company of your own…
In fact, you probably have more than one goal at any given time.
And maybe you’re quite good at going after some goals…
But chances are good that there are many goals that you haven’t achieved yet… because you haven’t even attempted them.
These are usually the big life goals that almost all people have… but so few actually accomplish.
Now, for every goal you wish you could achieve (but haven’t even tried), you probably have very valid reasons…
Maybe you wanted to write a book but you keep finding yourself too distracted with work to get started on your book.
Or maybe you wanted to start weight training but you never got there because finding the right trainer at the right gym was a huge hassle.
There are as many reasons to not start on your goals as there are stars in the sky, and many of these reasons are unique…
But Most Are Very, Very Common
One of the most common reasons people don’t pursue their most desired goals is doubt.
There’s a saying, “Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.” (Often misattributed, it was first written by Suzy Kassem, an artist, author, and philosopher.)
And it’s not just our own doubt that kills our dreams…
Oftentimes, it’s our fear that others will doubt us that does the trick.
Before we even get started, we think, “I’m worried what this important person in my life will say about it.”
Whether it’s your spouse, your parents, or a close friend or colleague, when someone important to you doubts you, it hurts.
And it can stop you from wanting to move ahead.
Maybe you’ve always wanted to open a restaurant, but your wife thought it would flop so you never pursued that dream.
Or maybe you wanted to go down a new career path at work, but someone you thought of as a mentor voiced concerns that you wouldn’t be very good at it…
No matter how subtle this doubt may be, the fear of this kind of judgement stops many people dead in their tracks…
But It Doesn’t Have To
A while back, I had Tom Bilyeu as a guest on London Real. He has a fantastic way of looking at doubt that will change the way you feel about this.
Instead of worrying about the doubt and judgement of others, he looks at doubt as a gift and encourages you to do the same.
Sounds strange, right? Let me explain.
If you’re not familiar, he’s an American entrepreneur who’s been at the helm of two game-changing companies – previously at Quest Nutrition (maker of the well-known protein bars and other high-quality dietary supplements) and now at Impact Theory (a company dedicated to “leveraging the self-sustaining power of commerce to radically influence global culture”).
He didn’t set out to be a CEO or even an entrepreneur originally, though. He went to college for film, of all things, and then spent years working for a data loss company.
When that job came to an abrupt end, he thought long and hard about what industry he really wanted to be in before settling on fitness and nutrition.
At that point, Tom had no experience in food or manufacturing. When people doubted him, he could have easily given and gone back to an industry he knew more about.
Instead, he decided he needed to prove his doubters wrong. He used their skepticism as fuel for the fire and began testing recipes for the perfect protein bar in his own kitchen.
The Rest, As They Say, Is History
Quest Nutrition went on to become a billion dollar company. This is something Bilyeu never would have never achieved if he took the doubt of others to heart.
He explained his perspective on doubt thusly:
“Only certain people want to make change at the level that will allow them to achieve whatever they want in their life. (You have to) meet people with empathy and compassion wherever they are.”
He went on to describe a situation in which someone told him that they really wanted to accomplish big things, but their mother had a fixed mindset about what was really possible, so she kept making discouraging comments that held them back from progress. They asked Tom what they should do in this situation.
That’s when he explained how he flips the script. Instead of being upset that the mother was eroding away a dream with her personal doubts, Tom says this person should be grateful for the gift that these doubts bring.
You see, everyone starts towards their goals with a belief that achieving these goals is actually possible.
If we didn’t have just that single kernel of belief to begin with, well, then, we wouldn’t even bother with those dreams.
I, myself, for example, have never believed that I could be an NBA center forward… but I did believe I could make a difference in the lives of many, so I started on the path that became London Real.
Once you have that belief, you will of course come across people who don’t share it, and those people will present you with their doubts.
As misguided as these doubts may be, they’re usually not ill-intentioned, so don’t think of them as obstacles that will stop you.
Instead, Think Of Them As Challenges…
That will only help your belief in your abilities to grow.
When you’ve got a goal and you’re faced with the doubt of others, don’t worry. Meet your detractors with empathy and compassion, decide that their worries are just challenges you can overcome, and then do the work to get where you need to be.
Editor, Brian Rose Uncensored